Tired of Airing my DIrty Linen
I do feel sad these days, but it was no point of re-saying it since it is a destiny that I have to accept. Previously, my mum have to leave the kids at home for the entire week for her job in KT. Fine, I am able to look after them every night but when it come to leave the money for the entire week's provision, it was too little. I do wonder what happened to RM700++ I gave her for the entire month. RM50 to feed 2 teenage boys & 3 little girl for a week doesnt make any sense at all. So i dont mind to use my own pocket money again but it is always the same thing, all over again. Over years, mum claimed that she does not have enough money to cover all the expenses, so I made this choice of leaving my kid for her to take care where the babysitter's money will go to food expenses while she tries to find another job soon. I am also taking care of the loan for the house which currently I am paying through my salary deduction. Overall, this month alone, I have spent around RM1000++ to cover our family's need. But definitely my contribution would not be as so significant like my brother's as he was spending RM300 for my mum's car repair. If he still have to contribute, I believed he can afford another RM600 for food provision. For Hari Raya, he must spent around RM200 for petrol and toll (they went back to Melaka this year)and his alone would probably around RM1200++. Before that, he spent RM500++ for my sister's baju raya and mum new handbag. So it was almost a RM1700++.
So the question was, if two of us had to part our hard-earned RM2700++, WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR FATHER'S PENSION MONEY for our little brother and sister? All i can find in kitchen was three small tin of sardine, some expired bread, an empty egg crate, empty bottle of cooking oil, three pack of Instant Maggie Noodles and frankly speaking, I was still wondering of what happened to our money. I almost cried to see the kitchen's provision which supposedly to have more items for our brother and sister and my kid. When my sister Sakinah mentioned that mum only gave them RM10 to cover their dinner and lunch daily, I almost like "whoa, this has gone too far" They are under-nourished kid which I think it was fine with me the last time. So I Have to confront mum this time of her lack of attention to my sibling's need.
That is my mum's case. If she is not busy attending her lover's need (laundry, ironing stuff) she will be missing (I assume she went for dates). SO the BF was having some mild heart attack and she has to take care of him in the hospital. I think that is too much to burden my mum, and I always reminded this man not to burden her. Last night she accidentally sent me SMS of her missing being in KL as KT was already a dead town at 7 pm which means that the sms supposedly to go to the lover, not us. URghh.
And for my father's case, he secretly borrowed my brother's new satria just to bring my mak tiri and adik beradik tiri to visit my evil grandmother in Temerloh. All the while, we knew that he is paying my mak tiri's KEMBARA for RM700++ monthly so why bother using other people's car? WHile I caught him red-handed, he was really shocked when I yelled at him to visit his son in Rawang since he had not even see his son during Raya (too busy celebrating raya with the other family). I bet if mum knows this, she will declare war with father again. Again, I am tired of reminding my own father to fulfill his responsibilities as a parent. Over the years, I already gave up of contacting my father just for the sake of my brother and sisters. If he really cares, he would be there for us though he hates my mum. And today, I am crying buckets cause I have yelled again at my father till he gave up and agreed to see my siblings tonight. Again, he still need to depend on my brother who's going to finish his shift at 8 pm tonight.
I hate being a kid who always to remind my parents to really care their children and not to focus on their problems only. We need them as our parents, not someone who gave birth us for no reason.
I hate my parents. I really hate them!
So the question was, if two of us had to part our hard-earned RM2700++, WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR FATHER'S PENSION MONEY for our little brother and sister? All i can find in kitchen was three small tin of sardine, some expired bread, an empty egg crate, empty bottle of cooking oil, three pack of Instant Maggie Noodles and frankly speaking, I was still wondering of what happened to our money. I almost cried to see the kitchen's provision which supposedly to have more items for our brother and sister and my kid. When my sister Sakinah mentioned that mum only gave them RM10 to cover their dinner and lunch daily, I almost like "whoa, this has gone too far" They are under-nourished kid which I think it was fine with me the last time. So I Have to confront mum this time of her lack of attention to my sibling's need.
That is my mum's case. If she is not busy attending her lover's need (laundry, ironing stuff) she will be missing (I assume she went for dates). SO the BF was having some mild heart attack and she has to take care of him in the hospital. I think that is too much to burden my mum, and I always reminded this man not to burden her. Last night she accidentally sent me SMS of her missing being in KL as KT was already a dead town at 7 pm which means that the sms supposedly to go to the lover, not us. URghh.
And for my father's case, he secretly borrowed my brother's new satria just to bring my mak tiri and adik beradik tiri to visit my evil grandmother in Temerloh. All the while, we knew that he is paying my mak tiri's KEMBARA for RM700++ monthly so why bother using other people's car? WHile I caught him red-handed, he was really shocked when I yelled at him to visit his son in Rawang since he had not even see his son during Raya (too busy celebrating raya with the other family). I bet if mum knows this, she will declare war with father again. Again, I am tired of reminding my own father to fulfill his responsibilities as a parent. Over the years, I already gave up of contacting my father just for the sake of my brother and sisters. If he really cares, he would be there for us though he hates my mum. And today, I am crying buckets cause I have yelled again at my father till he gave up and agreed to see my siblings tonight. Again, he still need to depend on my brother who's going to finish his shift at 8 pm tonight.
I hate being a kid who always to remind my parents to really care their children and not to focus on their problems only. We need them as our parents, not someone who gave birth us for no reason.
I hate my parents. I really hate them!
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